A Risk Well Taken

About 20 minutes ago I received a phone call...what may be the best phone call I've ever had the pleasure of taking. I immediately stopped what I was doing and answered, despite not knowing who it was. The soft, timid voice of my oncologist was on the other end of the line and asked to speak with me...a sense of urgency was detected. I knew right then and there it was regarding my recent PET scan. He sounded as if he had little time to take the call but I'm so glad he did...because it was the best news I could have hoped for.

"The scan results show an almost complete response, with very little cancer activity detected. This is very surprising as you have only had one treatment and the scan having been done only a week after. I'm moving your next chemo date up to this Monday and I need you to go get your bloodwork done sometime this weekend. I don't even think it's necessary for you to repeat the scan as I'm sure you will be in a remission following one more cycle of this chemo. I will reach out to the transplant team at Johns Hopkins to see if you can get a transplant within the next few weeks. Congratulations!"

I was at a loss for words and only managed to utter a thank you before the conversation ended. I took a minute to process before staggering up the two flights of stairs to tell my dad and sister the news. The transplant is a go!!!! The pains of this chemo and the risk I took were worth it entirely!! I received news that many people thought would never happen. The odds weren't even in my favour and still, I was determined to seek the impossible! And I succeeded!

Needless to say, my faith has been restored through this news, and I'm so proud of myself for making the decision I did. It was all worth it in the end. All of it! Now I have to scramble yet again to find caregivers and rush to get the necessary appointments needed to proceed. I'm potentially looking at a transplant this next month so I have to act fast. But for today...I intend on celebrating the news and letting it sink in...I might just have a new lease on life.

PET Prep

I SURVIVED!!!!! 

I've made it over the first hurdle of this ICE chemotherapy. I apologize for not typing as much during that ordeal, but I was not kidding in my last post when I said I was "sleeping the days away". Besides the occasional visits from my friends and family, I was so drugged up on Benadryl and other things that I slept through it entirely. Most of the hospital trip was a blur, and I didn't feel comfortable posting something in that state.

Even the return home was unbearably tiring. The first two days I literally spent in bed. Every part of my body ached, and I had absolutely no energy to do just about anything. Simply going up a flight of stairs was enough to cause my head to spin. The nausea was under control thanks to the two strong anti-nausea meds I was living off of. However, I hear that the next round will be harder, as the chemo naturally builds up over time...and I still have two cycles waiting for me.

Along with the anti-nausea meds, I'm back to giving myself daily injections. Unlike the fertility treatment shots I was on two years ago, these are mainly to keep my white blood cell count up. My immune system is completely shot down with this chemotherapy, and to prevent hospitalization, I need to take a shot every night. Thankfully there isn't any bloating and I haven't experienced any changes in hormones. I also get away with any pain by applying an ice cube to the spot just before the pinch...so I really shouldn't complain...but it's become such a chore.

So here I am recovering from the aches and pains...which is no small feat. To celebrate this moment, my doctor scheduled a PET scan to see how I'm responding to treatment. I am not going to jinx anything on here, but I will say this...I have a very good feeling about the upcoming results. I can feel it...

Then this morning while doing the necessary labs for the scan tomorrow, I realized...I never did explain what the PET scan process is to you all who have never had one. Let me enlighten you...it's quite the process. A PET scan is a positron emission tomography which uses nuclear medicine to capture full body images. As I said I went to do "necessary labs" this morning...necessary as in a pregnancy test. You can't undergo something with THAT much radiation if you have any chance of being pregnant. Even though I'm on a shot that makes pregnancy almost impossible, I still have to be tested. Naturally, my social life (or lack of one) has become an ongoing joke between me and the radiologists.

Tomorrow I have to report to the radiology department after fasting all morning and afternoon (my appointment is late in the day...yay...). Once I'm called back and vitals are taken, I'm led to a tiny room with a reclining chair. The technician then proceeds to prick my finger to test my blood sugar. If it's too high then I can't proceed with the scan, but that has never happened (and hopefully never will). Then they set up a temporary IV and leave the room to get the radioactive dye used for the scan. The dye comes in a metal casing...almost like it's top secret or something. I always joke that it's going to give me super powers for the day...because you know they've heard that joke a million times. Haha!

Once it's injected, the technician reclines my chair, turns off the lights, and instructs me to take an hour nap. I'm not allowed to talk, read, listen to music, etc...nothing stimulating so the dye can circulate in my body without any issue. Once the hour is up I'm told to use the restroom and then report to the CT machine. The scan itself takes about 30 minutes to do and they capture images from the head down. The images not only show what your organs look like but how they are functioning, and any cancerous activity is easier to see under this scan. Unfortunately, the scan cannot be repeated too frequently due to the amount of radiation involved...so it may be another month until I can get it again. Hopefully, by that time, I might be looking forward to proceeding with a transplant come March! You never know, right?

So that's the gist of what will happen tomorrow. I have a very good feeling about this scan, and I'm SUPER eager to see what the results are. Despite how toxic and harsh this chemo is, something about it just feels right...like it's meant to be. I just hope I'm right and that I've made the right decision. I'll let you know in the next few days when the results are in.

Sleeping The Days Away

Happy New Year everyone! It's been a couple days since I've written in here so I thought I'd give a small update while my eyes are open. I'm fighting so hard just to stay awake to type this. My sleep schedule is so messed up lately and it's mainly due to cancer and this chemo regimen. I'm typing in my hospital bed while staring out the window to the view of rush hour traffic. Every part of my body is screaming for me to go to sleep, and I will...but first I want to let everyone know what's going on.

Two days ago I got the call from my insurance telling me I have the ok to get treatment at a nearby hospital. They reserved a bed for me for Monday morning. Yesterday, my mom dropped me off before heading to work. She wanted to leave early as she would be facing not only traffic but an ice storm. I was in an unusually chipper mood most of the day. I took a tour of the floor I'm staying on and flipped through all the movies they have on demand. I did some connect the dots and a little bit of reading. But most of the day was spent resting.

Night time came along and the first drug was administered as soon as my blood work went through. I took a ton of pre-meds along with some Benadryl which made me super sleepy. I was completely out when a nurse came in very late at night telling me I needed to get an injection. I was so confused partly from the meds but also because I had no recollection that I needed such an injection in my stomach. The nurse told me I could refuse it but I wasn't going to turn down what my doctor said was protocol. I could barely keep my head up but managed to give the ok. Literally, the next thing I know I get a huge pinch in my stomach and I was once again knocked out.

Another haze of confusion happened around 4am when I was told I needed to have blood drawn. I was told they couldn't take blood from my port like they did earlier in the day and that they needed to draw blood from my arm. So I started rolling up my right arm when they said it NEEDED to be my left since I had an IV in my right arm. I kept trying to tell them I had nothing in my arms and that my right arm was the easy access. They kept insisting I get it in my left arm. So instead of fighting it, I decided to roll up my left arm, thinking it might put the matter to rest and me along with it. One more pinch and I was falling back to sleep again.

Next thing I know, I'm woken up again at around 5:30 am to take a pill. This time I had absolutely no recollection of it. The only reason I know this happened was because the nurse told me it happened. So bizarre. All morning and afternoon long I've been trying to catch up on sleep. I'm so sleepy and bored here. The food isn't too bad but my appetite has been really bad these past few weeks. I've also lost 10 pounds in almost 2 weeks.

Well, I'm already starting on my second drug for the day. The next one is a 24-hour drip and if I don't have any reactions then hopefully this chemo will be smooth sailing...hopefully. I think I'm gonna try to sleep some more and type again later when I'm awake enough sound coherent. I'll be in the hospital until either Friday evening or Saturday morning...that is if everything goes well. I'm sure I'll have more to talk about as the days go on. Thank you all for your support and stay tuned for any updates!!